i NEED this PORTFOLIO

Source:Olsens Anonymous

I WANT THIS PORTFOLIO.


NOW.

On another note, did you really just pair Billabong with Stella McCartney fishnet sandals, MK? And you're fatter than Ashley now?

REALLY MK?

She is THIS close from being on my shit list.

Now I'm in the mood to go thrifting... bleh

Second Look

Shirt, sweater, tie, belt, loafers: thrifted/vintage. Slacks: H&M. Watch: Urban. Glasses: Brooks Brothers.

So this is what I plan on wearing during the day. We're going to have breakfast and then do a bunch of random crap that will probably be really boring, haha. Then we have a dinner that night. They won't tell us where or what the dinner is but they said "you won't want to miss this" as if we have a choice? lol Well I decided that I would wear a bow-tie just to spice things up and establish my clownery with my future classmates. Ugh, I hope they don't hate me. This is so stressful. I wish it was like college where I didn't have to worry about ppl liking me. Anyways, I couldn't decide if I should wear my skull bow-tie or the green one?





Tartan shirt, vintage/thrifted. Green bow-tie, vintage. Skull bow-tie, Target.

hmmmmmmm?

New Bag

I practically thrifted this thing out of a garbage can. It's seriously on it's last leg but I don't care I still love it. It doesn't even zip haha. The weird thing I found out after I bought was that it zips up into an even smaller planner/portfolio looking thing. it's really an odd bag.

I took pictures of my Second Look outfits! I'm going for pulled together and professional yet style savvy i.e. sexual nerd. I don't want to look like some frumpy med student who just rolled in a JC Penney's sales bin. Ugh!

I'll update with the photos soon. I'll be expecting honest critique and advice!

I <3 Hamish

Here is a quote from Hamish on Beth Ditto's performance at the Fendi party:

"Having brought the house down with the spectacular 'Standing in the Way of Control,' Beth decided to execute a celebratory stage dive, a move that I can only describe as ill advised with a mosh pit comprising various supermodels and sundry fashionistos in aching want of a square repas[t]. In fact, as far as I could determine, there was a parting of the waves as the svelte and deeply panicked hordes flung themselves out of the oncoming path of the potential weapon of mass destruction that is la Ditto, and there was something closely resembling a resounding thud in place of the expected slap of flesh on expectantly upraised palms."

Oh. My. God. I swear Hamish and I are somehow related. If he ever wants to adopt a son (or a boyfriend) I'll be waiting patiently. If I ever meet him I will die. DIE.

In other news, I have to go to second look weekend next weekend. Second look is when you go back to a med school to make sure you really like it and meet other people who were accepted and whatnot. At first I was pissed bc they sent me an e-mail saying that we were all going to get t-shirts to wear for the weekend. I was ready to call Karl and have the poor demode being who came up with that idea executed. Luckily, however, we are NOT getting t-shirts. As such, I've been planning my outfits for over a week and I'll be needing some opinions so that I don't meet my future classmates and professors looking like a clown hooker himbo slut like I normally do. I'm going to take a few pictures of my outfits and post them soon. I NEED HELP!

later lovers ;)

The Black & White "Ball"

This was our last night out. We were supposedly going to a black and white "ball". Of course we get there and they're charging extra cover and they decorated with toilet paper or something. I mean I usually love tsi but this was just kind of busted. Lauren is wearing a spandex dress, Dr. Marten's heeled lumber jack boots, and vintage Balmain purse. I bought her the faux fur cape-let stole thing for her birthday. Drew decided to totally ignore the black and white dress code and wear a vintage red flannel, haha. I like robbed an ice cream man for my outfit on the way.

The scariest thing ever happened at the hotel this night. Ugh, I was like walking down the hall to get ice so we could make a round of skinny bitches and prepare for a toilet paper swathed evening. As soon as I walk out of the room this 50 year old drunk lady is like running through the halls shooting some crazy flashing alien toy gun thing. I was obviously startled. Then she sees me and seriously falls in the floor laughing at me and saying "look at his clothes!" I was like "Oh, thanks precious! Do you know where the ice machine is?" She obviously ignores me and goes and grabs her two little slut cheerleader daughters, Miley and Jamie Lynn, and her friend so that they can stare at me. Ughhhh! Then the two little sluts like start laughing too but they also looked a little scared. I'm not sure if it was bc they were scared for their mom or bc of me. I wanted TO DIE. It was so awkward.

Anyways, that's all of the pictures from this weekend. Well there are more but I can't post them all on here and I'm sure this is enough, haha.

Bye hookers!

Thursday Night's Debauchery and Sexual Scandals

Yay for Lauren and Drew visiting! I can't even talk about how sexual lauren looks in every picture. These are pics from our first night out. There were two other nights of shenanigans that I am going to post on. This is my Lanvin shirt... kind of boring but hey it's Lanvin, it was practically free, and it's soft. Lauren's Stella McCartney wedges are the most beautiful things I've ever seen in my life. I can't even look at them for very long bc my eyes will explode from all of the hot hot sexuality they're exuding, haha.

In other news, everyone apparently thinks my last post were like stills from RuPaul's Drag Race. I don't get it? I didn't think it was THAT girly. Ugh, I'm a clown.

Ok, I'm exhausted. I'll post the rest of the pictures ASAP. I'm tired after three nights of drinking and out of control ridiculousness lol.

bye bitches :)

Karma's a BITCH

My cousin Chelsea and I looking like wasted busted disasters. I'm wearing: Peirre Cardin tie, plaid shirt, and faux croc belt, all vintage/thrifted. Gap shorts. Brooks Brothers Glasses. Urban Outfitters watch. Drink: vodka and diet coke (i.e. Skinny Bitch, haha)

Haha! I think it's so funny that right after I make a post about how I hate Jacksonville bc everyone is busted I go over to the local party photog's website and find these pictures of my looking like a wasted Quasimodo hunchback disaster lol. I love it when I stick my foot in my mouth and become totally humbled as an outcome. It's so morally pleasing. Additionally, I worked this weekend and realized that there are actually a lot of really cute stylish ppl here in Jax. I guess since I work with all of them I kind of get used to it. Not to mention, I am a major perfectionist/pessimist so I tend to blow the smallest inadequacies out of proportion. Basically, what I'm trying to say is that there are some really cool kids here and that everyone, myself included, has their off days. So, I need to stop complaining and just have fun! I only have 139 days until I go to hell (i.e. med school) so I need to strive to see the best in everything and everyone! Ok this is almost enough positivity to make me barf... lol

Actually, now that I think about it, there are some people here that are so well dressed that I get excited about the prospect of seeing them out bc I know they will be visual and sartorial masterpieces. There is this one guy that I know who is a party promoter at a few clubs here. He and I were having drinks a few weeks ago and he told me he's been looking for top hats and Bob Dylan sunglasses. I was floored to say the least.

In other news, while I was at work on Saturday a customer asked me if I was the guy from Dr. Debonaire! Haha, I was so flattered/confused/slightly embarrassed. He was such a nice guy. He said he had a blog as well but I was too flustered to remember to ask for the link. Haha, so that was random!

Oh AND May over at MayK All Day Everyday gave me the following "I Like You" award:



Ahh! I think the last award I got was like in 4th grade and it was for like good citizenship or perfect attendance or something lame. This was like the nicest thing ever May! Thank you so much! You're a doll! Marry me? Actually, "runaway with me?" is so much more romantic...

K I gotta get some REST! I'm tutoring pre-calculus tomorrow, barf!

Bye Sex Machines :)

p.s. Lauren from the infamous NYE post is visiting this weekend! If the postal service is working efficiently she may have some VERY exciting new shoe porn to share with us!!! EEEK!

I wish Jacksonville would fall off the face of the earth

Tee and cardigan, American Apparel. Shorts, The Gap. Faux croc belt and loafers, vintage. Watch, Urban Outfitters. Glasses, Brooks Brothers.

I wore this out running errands yesterday and then I was too lazy to change before going out so I wore it out to a bar, too haha. I'm really starting to hate Jacksonville. It is seriously a quagmire of conservatism and egregious fashion sense. It's so annoying to go out and never EVER see one person that is remotely well dressed much less stylish and unique. Ughh, woe is me. I guess there are worse things in the world. On another note, I just found out that one of my friends from college got assigned to a client here in Jax for two weeks! So that should be fun. Also, I'm doing brunch with another friend from high school *gasp* on sunday! So I do have a few things to look forward to!

I've seriously been trying to get in shape because summer is just around the corner and I have some seriously cute and seriously short vintage board shorts that I am DYING to wear to some beach/pool party or something. However, they won't be seriously cute on me if I look like a bloated pubescent 14 year old with man boobs. My regimen thus far has been starvation and running everyday. I don't think it is working quick enough so I'm going to have to start going to the gym and using those weird things called weights and a few other torture devices. Hopefully this will pay off and I'll look sexual in time for summer parties. We shall see!

On second thought, I have no friends so I don't know who is going to be hosting these amazing parties I'm imagining in my head. Hopefully, I can make a trip to nyc or something. That would be ideal.

Anyways, I hope you guys all have a wonderful weekend!

Bye LOVES!

My first boot outfit!

Glasses, Brooks Brothers. Scarf, vintage. Half-zip sweater, The Gap. Bomber, Zara. Jeans, Levi's. Boots, thrifted!

So this was my first time wearing the new boots. It was freezing out for Florida standards so I had to do some serious layering. I loved the boots though! They're so comfortable and they're lined with fleece so they kept my cankles warm. I thought ppl would be gawking at me but no one really seemed to notice. I suppose everyone was just wasted, haha. I wish we still had another month of cold weather so I could continue to play with my new purchase, but unfortunately, it's already like beach weather here. I worked at Urban today for the first time in like 3 weeks and all of the girls were like sunburnt and in bikini's. Ughhhh I HATE florida.

Oh AND I got my new glasses! I'm seriously in LOVE with them!! Here are a few close-ups:





They're actually sunglasses but I had prescription lenses put in them. I am obsesseddddd! I've never been so happy with a pair of frames in my life.

Ok, well I'm exhausted and need to get to bed. I am turning into such an old man. All of my friends are out at some florescent day-glo party, meanwhile, I'm sipping "sleepy time" tea whilst cuddled up in bed with my laptop haha. Additionally, I clearly don't own any day-glo so that is my excuse for not showing, haha.

bye bitches :)

Look What I Bought.... BOOTS

So yesterday I went to brunch and then went drunk shopping, haha. We went to the mall first and I didn't really find anything so we decided to go thrifting before dinner and I realllllly lucked out! I've been looking for boots like this since before fall and I've never been able to find any that were my size, price range, the style I wanted, etc.. When I first saw these yesterday I wasn't so sure if they were exactly what I wanted but then I looked at the price and they were only $4. Clearly, not buying them would have been a mistake. Now that I have them I have no clue what to wear them with? Leave me suggestions, please please PRETTY PLEASE!!

In other news, I was featured in the Global Fashion section of the March 2009 issue of the online fashion magazine N.E.E.T.

I think they cropped my thunder thighs into beautiful Snejana thighs. Oh the joys of cropping, haha.

Bye LOVERS :)